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Canceled Children’s Books

@lyndseydotw Replying to @t.cannon19 I gotchu, booboo 😘 #gaggift #nsfw #booktok ♬ original sound - Lyndsey Wright

Introducing the 'Cancelled Children's Books' series by Cleveland Steamer Press – where every page is a potential scandal waiting to erupt! Dive into whimsical tales of boating blunders, construction conundrums, culinary capers, and "handsy" activities all wrapped in cheeky innuendos that'll have you going balls deep with your reading choices. Perfect for those with a wicked sense of humor or a frenemy in need of a 'thoughtful' gift. Warning: May cause uncontrollable laughter, raised eyebrows, and a sudden urge to delete your social media. Read responsibly and make sure to send the whole series to your best friends, family, and definitely your enemies!

The Definitive Dictionaries of Corporate Nonsense Have Arrived

Welcome to Bury Your Soul: The Snark-Fueled, Corporate & Business Language Satire Series, where the world’s most soul-sucking business jargon, boardroom blather, and startup “innovations” are gleefully skewered. Each entry in this series demolishes the pretense of corporate-speak, decoding every buzzword, acronym, and grandiose phrase that’s ever assaulted your senses during an all-hands meeting or pitch deck review.

From dictionaries that expose “synergy” as empty filler, to anthologies recasting corporate scandals as Shakespearean sonnets and other literary absurdities, every volume provides a front-row seat to the circus of modern business language. This is your backstage pass to a world where “bandwidth” isn’t just a hollow excuse, “disruption” ceases to impress, and “minimum viable product” no longer triggers a thousand vacant stares.

Whether you’re fed up with tech bros bragging about “frictionless funnels,” bored senseless by endless “core competency” speeches, or fascinated by the idea of translating brand mission statements into laugh-out-loud parodies, this series shows you how to navigate business babble with a raised brow and a wicked grin.

Plunge in and find your personal bullshit radar upgraded. Each book in the Bury Your Soul series ensures you come away entertained, enlightened, and ready to mock even the loftiest corporate claims—because in these pages, no jargon is sacred, no buzzword is untouchable, and no piece of “thought leadership” escapes unscathed.

Discover Stories From Fancy Feline and Canine Friends!

Get ready for tales with a twist—crafted by paws, not people! From fashionista felines to adventure-loving pups, each book brings you a fresh, fur-filled perspective on life, friendship, and a dash of mischief. These aren’t just stories; they’re glimpses into the world through whiskers and wagging tails, packed with humor, charm, and a touch of wild whimsy. Snuggle up and dive into the quirky, wise, and wonderfully playful worlds of our four-legged authors!

Our Store! is Here

Yes, we sell books, but did you know, book publishing is a dying industry and we barely make any money! We therefore are making some funny merch to brighten up your day when you’re not curled up laughing with one of our books! This stuff is just as bonkers as our books and created by the same people that write our books!

Shop Only Fans Merch!

Celebrate the fan & hardware store that never made it past the last century. It's name is mysteriously trending again, and we've uncovered exclusive Only Fans merch celebrating a hopeful revival.

Books as Visually Stunning as they are hilarious!

Books as Visually Stunning as they are hilarious!

Instant Classics

Not only do we take the time to write the funniest, most canceled-est books around, but we also make them visually beautiful.

Why Buy Our Books?

Makes a Great Gift

Gift laughter with a hilarious book or bundle, perfect for friends or family. Titles like "Balls Deep" and "Hand Jobs for the Whole Family" will bring a fun time, ideal for housewarmings or white elephant gifts. These aren't just books; they're laughter-filled experiences that promise shared joy and memorable moments, perfect for bringing people together through humor.

Content Creators

Content creators seeking to delight their audience need look no further. These books are packed with humorous content that's perfect for engaging followers. Share excerpts or build segments around these humorous titles for increased engagement and laughter. They're a goldmine for creating standout, share-worthy content that keeps your audience coming back for more.

Adult Humor Kids Miss

These books cleverly disguise adult humor in tales that appear innocent to most kids, making them perfect for adult readers. Enjoy sophisticated laughs with stories like using a nutcracker in "busting a nut" or cleaning car wheels in "performing a rim job." They offer adults a delightful escape with humor that's both smart and hilarious, perfect for a lighthearted read without worrying about most young ears.

Perfect For Enemies

For those special someones you love to tease or can't stand, these books make unforgettable gifts. Send one to that annoying coworker, in-law, or ex to provoke or amuse. It's an inexpensive way to stir a reaction, whether it's laughter or shock, making these books perfect for a playful jab or a humorous vendetta.

Story Time With

Enjoy narration from the most talented, amazing, and influential narrator on Youtube with some Cleveland Steamer classics!

Hand Jobs for the Whole Family is the

#1 New Comedy Release on Amazon

Portrait of Author, Jack M. Offman

Author Spotlight

Author Spotlight

Jack M. Offman

Now, with three books in the Top Fifteen Bestsellers on Amazon for Comedy Books!

Jack M. Offman, the undiscovered gem of questionable children's novels, is a 40-something who finds joy in the nerdy realm of laser tag and video games—probably why he's still single. While his books might often get the silent treatment, he passionately dives into them after introspective beach walks and avoiding DUIs. And for the record, he's the kind of guy who'd never risk a sprint with scissors. Legends say his zest for life might just be infectious, if anyone bothered to listen.

Testimonials

  • An unforgettable and side-splitting masterpiece bulging at the seams, lol.

    Stephanie S.

  • A Transcendent Masterpiece Unparalleled in Modern Literature.

    Cory B.

  • An Instant Classic - A "Hands-On" Comedy Book For the Ages.

    Brian B.

  • Perhaps the finest piece of literature ever written.

    Jimbo M.

IT’s Not a Toss UP!

It’s a Hit!

Based on the hit children's book from Cleveland Steamer Press, we’ve partnered with Death By Toys to capture all of the fun and excitement of your first salad tossing. Each one comes with a free copy of the book, so don't miss out.Because each is made by hand, minor inconsistencies will occur. Comes with a Death Certificate of Authenticity from Death By Toys!

Who’s talking Crap!

Make any time the perfect with this sign-in book for your bathroom!

This quirky sign-in notebook is the perfect companion for your porcelain throne, inviting guests to drop their thoughts, doodles, and amusing anecdotes while they take care of business. Wrapped in a cover that's sure to flush out a smile, this notebook is a monumentally amusing addition to any guest bathroom. It's not just a gift, it's a throne-room companion that adds a splash of humor to housewarmings. Tailored with a classic, yet cheeky design, it encourages creative expressions, from tiny tinkles of thought to full-blown brain bombs. It's the ideal way for visitors to log their "duty" and leave behind a little piece of laughter in your lavatory.

Why We’re here.

Our Mission is to combine Intelligence with hilarity to unite the world in Childish joy.

National Institute of Health
‘Current research indicates that laughter has quantifiable positive physiologic benefits.’

Meet The Team

  • Amanda E. Tass

    World’s Most Fiery Illustrator

  • Al N. Decrapper

    Al N. DeCrapper

    Chief Copywriter

  • Ivana U. Tulik

    Ivana U. Tulik

    World’s Greatest Illustrator

  • Jack M. Offman

    “Best Selling Author” and Product Development Lead

  • Anita V. Gina

    God’s Gift to Illustration

  • Gil T. Azelle

    Gil T. Azelle

    Attorney

  • Phil A. Sheeyo

    Phil A. Sheeyo

    Reclusive Illustrator

  • Doggy Mc Dogface

    Chief Distraction Officer

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